I do agree that sex education MUST be practiced. But I don't think simply advocating for abstinence will work. Kids will go on to do and experiment with whatever they are curious about. There is no stopping it. What I think we should do is provide the right type of education about sex including what actually happens during sex, how people might come to decide on having sex, how partying and the use of alcohol could influence one's sexual experience, the various perspectives of sex from OTHER cultures, the consequences of having protected as well as unprotected sex and of course diseases. And plenty more! By informing young teenagers, and treating them with respect, they will get the idea that having sex is far more beyond that just the intercourse itself. By being unbiased, and supportive no matter what, that is being nonjudgmental while providing them the right education, they will be more self-aware of themselves and know that they owe themselves the respect and also deserve respect from others. With that said, when they choose to engage in sexual intercourse before marriage and at a young age, as long as they are fully aware of the consequences and are being safe about it, I will be totally okay with it.
Kids will do whatever they want to do. In front OR behind you back. Their friends will talk about it. Movies show it. There’s the inevitable porn on websites that someone is bound to come across and share with others. I think the best thing to do is let them know that they are in control of their body, and to let them be aware of the things that could result from having sex.
From that, yes, I think a video showing childbirths would be appropriate. As long as the education is not one sided i.e. biased. Simply saying, "if you have sex, you will die" like the gym coach in the movie Mean Girls, just won't work. It's one of the most backward methods of premarital sex prevention ever.
With regards to the school you mentioned, I say, KUDOS.
All the things I mentioned before, about the right type of education about sex, is IMPOSSIBLE in Malaysia. Because we are too conservative and stubborn and downright backwards with our ways. Sex education just WON’T happen because sex is too taboo in our country. They believe that by including any material involving sex, will encourage sex. They refuse to believe that it’s happening, they refuse to believe that kids are maturing way early than before, and they refuse to believe that sex education is important. Because of that, Malaysia has pretty fucked up views about sex.
Sex is so taboo, but it’s everywhere. On TV, on the net, in music, in books... no matter how bad you make it sound, there are still a thousand more reasons people can think of to want to try it. But our country makes it so hard for people who actually want to learn or educate about it. Anyone who attempts to address it will be shunned as sex is really just TOO taboo to talk about. Just like no one ever talks about using protection for sex because, "we don't want them to have sex in the first place". It's bloody unrealistic. And when people do try to do the right thing, they feel disgusted about it. How many people do you know will not touch a condom?
I know the school may cause people to think that it is fine for people to get pregnant at 14 but think about the broader picture. Sex is happening and you can’t do anything to stop it. We can only do our best in guiding our youths to making an INFORMED decision when it comes down to it. For that to happen, everyone should stop demonising sex. And I think.... that school for pregnant teens, is a great way to break the barrier and makes a great WAKE UP call to the locals. It’s a big move, a bold move, that says, THIS IS WHAT’S HAPPENING AND WE SHOULD STOP DENYING OR AVOIDING IT.
And really, a lot of teens are misguided in this generation. And that can be due to everything and anything from poor quality education, disturbed family backgrounds, low self-esteem etc etc etc, that you can't simply BLAME them alone for falling pregnant. Falling pregnant can be one of the side effects of a larger problem, like maybe, parental neglect? Or divorce. Or whatever. Girls will always seek to be loved, and guys will always find a way to have sex, be it to tell the girl he loves her and will always love her and tell her that to show that she loves him back is to sleep with him. When someone is lost and vulnerable, they’re easily manipulated and they WILL believe that by sleeping someone means to show that you love the person.
Then when someone falls pregnant early, what happens? They become the talk of the town. They get rejected by their families, friends, they lose all things valuable to them at their most important and fragile time of their lives. A school that won’t blame or judge is perfect to build their hopes again, to be in a supportive environment with other people who know what you’re going through, to know your future is still in their hands, to know their goals aren’t diminished as long as they continue to work hard and strive. A lot of teenagers end up regretting having sex early. And it’s not just because they’re horny. A ton of things could influence that. Media, peer pressure, alcohol, values, and all the stuff I said before. These things are never black and white. And just because teenagers fall pregnant early doesn’t mean they deserve to struggle forever. And just because they got pregnant, doesn’t mean they were stupid. Some were bright, but naive girls who knew nothing about sex but were coerced into doing it. And some, were genuinely in love with their partners who genuinely love them back, who were aware of the consequences but would like to be intimate and nurture the trust, end up with an unplanned pregnancy even after using protection. They still deserve a second chance at developing their careers, no?
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