Sunday, May 15, 2011

For the person who told me to update something more interesting

Break ups are hard. One always feels worse than the other and when its time to finally let go, parts of us still remain scarred. We carry the hurt and we find ways to learn and grow with the hurt for future relationships to come. Sometimes the hurt brings more trouble, in the sense that one experience brought too much heartache you try to avoid making the same mistake in the next one, and because it hurt so much you try extra hard to stop it but end up neglecting other important aspects of a relationship.

Well, humans aren't like vampires. We don't have a switch for pain or feelings that we can turn on and off. We can only find new ways to get by. I can't promise the day will come when you finally stopped wondering about your previous half. I can't promise that he will never come back to you either. For as long as he remained the most interesting thing to think about, you will keep thinking about him. Regardless how much you've accepted that things are over.

The thing is, the best part is yet to come. That thing about, always hoping when you receive a text it is from that one person, about, always hoping a missed call was from the same person... one day someone will surprise you, about how long that "bliss" can last. I'm not talking about break ups anymore. I'm talking about meeting someone, who after 15 months of dating you're still hoping that whatever call or text you have on your phone is from that person. I never imagined this possible... but it really is one of the sweetest surprises of life.

Imagine the magnitude of feeling shitty, turned around to the same magnitude but feeling so excited. And the fact that its a feeling of excitement just makes it so much more empowering. I've said the things about time healing the wounds, and letting yourself feel emo to fully let things out, I've mentioned to imagine happiness without being dependent, and also things like being honest to yourself... what you truly want and be responsible about achieving them. Now I'm asking, imagine happiness while you're with someone, someone that you don't know yet, keep the image blurry. Someone who shares the same humor with you, the same temperament, someone who inspires you to be better than yourself without losing the slightest bit of who you truly are. And imagine that even after years of knowing each other, an unexpected text from that particular human being, still without fail lights up your day.

Just imagine. I'm not asking anyone to fantasize. Just to imagine.

And I can tell you with so much certainty, that one day, someone will surprise you with these delights and even more. I don't know what else to say, except be excited. Sure moments are dull right now, but you have no idea what's in store for you. Instead of looking at it with gloom, why not try think of it as something you should be excited about? Till that day of surprises comes, don't over-think the situation, instead, just know at the back of your mind that it will come soon enough.

:)

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